Due to a flood in Vikings memorabilia being put up for auction, eBay has closed it’s doors. After Sunday’s loss to the New Orleans Saints, Vikings fans realize that they actually PAID FOR jerseys, flags, mugs, cups, hats, jackets and the list goes on. Local Vikings fan Tom Belfar said, “I’m just really glad I kept my Packers stuff. I mean, with Favre possibly retiring this year, I might need to switch teams again next fall. The Pack is looking good.”
Favre Jerseys are the most abundantly available after whispers of retirement started up. The perennial retiree mentioned to one of the janitors of the Superdome Sunday night that, “I’m going to call Mort and retire…..but not officially, probably…..I’m going to see how I feel in July. Wear do I put these towels?” Mr. Favre left the locker room and left his pants on the ground.
In a related story, Prince’s Vikings fight song has been banned from all airwaves everywhere. Even home use could result in a $450 fine. The FCC has determined that not only is the song detrimental to the health of all living creatures, but in solely responsible for the loss to the New Orleans Saints Sunday night. The Vikings players could not stop thinking about how horrible and stomach-retching it was. Prince plans to re-release Purple Rain under the new title Purple Pain on February 7th.
(pst… this is fake news, dummy)
OMG Topher you are hilarious